[OOM: The Balcony of Suite 132]

[mnt_raph]

It's cold outside, but not as cold as it has been. Just cold enough to momentarily take your breath away, but without all of that messed up nose-freezing stuff that requires undignified twitching to fix.

Raph's flopped himself down into a patio chair, while his wheel chair stands guard on the opposite side of the sliding glass doors.

Sometimes you just need quiet....and a little nicotine.

Comments

[mnt_raph]

He grins.

"I don't truck with theory. Ain't killed me yet, so they can't be that bad."

Because in Raph's mind anything that hasn't killed him yet, won't.
....
Except maybe magic.

[awesome_lilly]

"Huh."

Lilly considers this.

"That is actually not the worst life philosophy I've heard in this place. Well played, Raph. Well played."

[mnt_raph]

"I got my moments."

A glimmer of the smug bastard returns.

"So what was it? The worst life philosophy, I mean."

[awesome_lilly]

"Well, they've never said it to me out loud, but... totally the Ooompa Loompas," Lilly says, leaning in a little.

She lowers her voice conspiratorially before continuing.

"I mean, the ones we have here rebelled by leaving a world of chocolate to come clean the bar! What kind of life philosophy says that's a good idea?"

[mnt_raph]

"Maybe they're allergic?"

It's the only explanation that comes to mind.
Well, maybe not only.

"Or just like, sick of the stuff?"

[awesome_lilly]

"I suppose they could be," Lilly says doubtfully. "But even then, why would they leave and go... clean stuff?"

She shakes her head.

"I really think they're just messed up. And around here, that's saying something."

[mnt_raph]

"Oh I ain't sayin' they're right in the head, far freakin' from it. Little fuckers booted the chair."

Always the chair. Never my chair.

[awesome_lilly]

"Booted the chair?"

It takes Lilly a second to realize that this is not some kind of really disturbing euphemism.

"Oh! Oh, that chair. Parking boot. Got it. Wow, they did? Damn. That might call for some kind of revenge, you know."

[mnt_raph]

"Yeah? You think? Even if it was just them followin' orders?"

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly arches an eyebrow.

"Whose orders?"

[mnt_raph]

There's probably a name for the look he's giving her right now, and we bet it's not a polite name.

"Who the fuck do you think? I'll give you three guesses, an' all of them gotta end in O."

[awesome_lilly]

Lilly gracefully allows her head to drop onto her knees, holding the cigarette well out of reach.

"Okay, it's official."

Her voice is somewhat muffled by blanket and chagrin.

"Smoking makes you stupid. So, then. What are you going to do to Mikey?"

[mnt_raph]

"Dunno yet. Gotta be good though. Real good."

Mostly because he can't run.

"Suggestions?"

[awesome_lilly]

"Hmmmm."

Lilly lifts her head and takes a contemplative drag of her cigarette.

"He booted your wheelchair. We need a proportionate response. I'd say you could boot his ride, but Mel's a Slayer. She'd get out of it too fast."

[mnt_raph]

Here comes the facepalm.

"...as if hearin' it ain't punishment enough...."

[awesome_lilly]

"Please, I've been listening to it longer than you have," Lilly replies, airily dismissing Raph's squeamish sensibilities. "At this point, I can practically tell exactly what they're doing from the changes in pitch."

That said, she returns to the topic at hand.

"What does Mikey hold sacred or use every day or something?

[mnt_raph]

Raph has to really think about this...

"His 'chuks?"

[awesome_lilly]

"Mikey wears Chuck Taylors?"

Lilly and Raph would be much better conspirators if they spoke the same language.

"Ohhh! Nunchuks. My bad."

[mnt_raph]

He's still deep in thought.

"Nah, takin' his Chuckie T's wouldn't do much. I don't think his feet're big enough for'em now. They ain't the kinda shoe you can really wear with the wrong sized feet."

[awesome_lilly]

"Most shoes aren't," Lilly replies, wise in the ways footwear.

"As for his nunchucks... I don't know. I mean, he'd probably freak nicely and all, but then he's weaponless which is not always a good thing around here. Oh! Ducks! What about the ducks?"

[mnt_raph]

Okay, that gets his attention.

"Ducks?"

[awesome_lilly]

"Mikey has a collection of vibrating ducks," Lilly explains. "He and Mel love them like tiny plastic... vibrating ducks."

She smiles.

"We could ducknap them. Or remove their vibratability. Or both!"

[mnt_raph]

"He has a collection of what?"

[awesome_lilly]

"Vibrating ducks," Lilly says again.

She tilts her head.

"Man, you haven't noticed those? I thought ninjas were all like, keenly observant and stuff."

[mnt_raph]

"HOW WOULD I HAVE NOTICED VIBRATING DUCKS?"